history part 6

February 2004.... it's Chinese New Year....

he's not local thus we were not seeing each other during the festive seasons. our 1st 'separated' after being 'close friends' for months. i missed him when he's not around coz we met almost 24/7. but we still kept our contact of SMS each other, calls not often but i personally prefer sms .... maybe i don't want to let him 'know' my feelings from my voice... so we sms... and those 'intimate words' started to spell out... '..... i don't like here... v boring... i hope your by my side now'................

i kept read it again and again.... the very old model of hp's buttons almost damaged after my non stop of repeating 'exercise'. i knew, i like this person, but i won't tell him. i need to think what i want for myself.... no matter how, i won't take the 1st step....

the super long days of 'seperated' ( i think it's just like 3 to 4 days afterall) seems to 'challenge' my feelings to him. then we straight away catch up the day he backed....

i remembered well the place, coz i met 3 people sitting few tables away... hahhha
then we continue usual 'schedule' of chit chat and what happened when we both not for each other.... i took his classic hp ( this was v stylish hp back in those day... nokia 3310 if not mistaken) started to play with it. i realised, when i felt shy , i have this habit of browsing people's hp, as if want to see what they had inside.

and i was there, MENU==>Messages==>inbox==> fong lynn
fong lynn
fong lynn
.......
i saw my name on the screen, not one not two... but all the messages in inbox (those days inbox only can kept up to 10 messages only )... it's all my correspondances with him.... something has really going on btw us.... just that we won't want to bring it out....

i smiled... inside my heart.... i felt happy ....i did.... =)

then we left the place.. walking back to his cute lil car.... i remembered, we past by the alley... it;s kinda dark... all of a sudden, i saw the thing i feared the most until now... MICE... and i just scream.... not really loud, but something like 'ARRrrrrr'.... my body just noturally moved aside avoid seeing it, and shit... i accidentally 'touched' him for the 1st time.... i was so embarassing....what am i doing....

but no worries, i'm a good actress of hiding and keep myself back 2 calmness..

so we end our 1st outing after 'long seperation'.....
i explore new things...
i knew my feelings...
we didn't spell out.....
but i knew
he has special place in my current life...

i like night time...
and it's february 04