jpop dream

i had enough stories of assholes that make me so pissed off. ARGHHHH so damn hard to avoid them. i am so scared that, in short future, i will make conclusion : all balls are assholes.

anyway jus live with it.

It's not like i can't live without man, though being in a relationship, having companion/partner , someone to share in life is really good. well like old sayings, we all need to have companion, totally agree, but maybe im just those type need to be in matured marriage, rather than in early age. since im sure, im immatured type, im not selfish, but i just dunno how to take care of myself, im lazy, damn lazy type, i jus wan money sufficient to feed myself, i never really care about anything else. like wat im doing now, i like it, coz i still can vomit out some amount to pampered myself. This year i spolt myself a lot, my record!

in 3 weeks time, i will be realising my jpop dreams, i had since i was 16. its all thx to Yunni who recommend me arashi, then there's no turning back. im addicted to johnnys , from wink-up i get to know from smap, tokio, arashi, v6 to kat-tun, yama p etc; at the same time, j drama is attacking me like crazy, i had love generations which is my fav j drama so far, i jus love takeshi-san, which looks good in ALL hair style. then until HERO, blah blah blah... omg i jus love takesi n arashi; their songs making me so GENKI**ne

however, im so sad tat they just wont come to Msia at all, nearest is oni thailand, they went to there for few times for concerts, guess their market there is way far i can imagine of... wink up make me know more of them, and i tell myself then, i shall go nippon once in my lifetime. but the expenses is CRAZILY high, esp the accommodations, food, transportation etc.. easily 10k per pax for a trip like 1 week.

heheee.. i think i must pray a lot, that my god listen to my wish for so long, i am realising my jpop dream at least 5-10 years faster! so during last promo of mas, i don really think much but jus book for the return tic, but now seeing aa can get anytime within da $$ i pay, kns.. nvm pay for da mas hospitality, since everything is unlimited. im going to enjoy kao kao. plus its narita, not haneda yo**its just like da diff of subang airport and klia. but narita still diff.. hehehee trying hard 2 comfort myself da $$ i pay is worthwhile. coz i never been to klia for international departure, im da only one at family never been lo... how can!? good im going this time!! maybe its my first and last @klia and narita dy =( sigh y must cheap airfare in diff place though same piece of klia add... FFFF okay i admit, i just want to explore whats inside the intl departure @klia, coz i heard they have almos everything ooo...

so im going to rainbow bridge, it appears in almost all jdrama of the 90s. oh no i miss my love gen theme song dy.. i miss their street scene, the train, the crowd the view of nippon. and im going shinjuku,harajuku, oayama, jiyojuku, roppongi, omotesando hills, odaiba, gotemba, and disneyland. planning to go both disneyland & disney sea. if both cost around 10,000 yen. should i? should i not? if just disneyland is at 5,800 yen. coz i personally not really a big fan of disney, mayb i go disneyland would be good enough? coz 5,800 yen is like almost rm220 dy!! okay la, jus go one will be fine la, plus need to go for meals, souvenirs somemore ler... kns .. our currency damn low....

well i need to find posters/adv of arashi and take shoots. this is a must! its my jpop dream. so da rest, err no idea yet, maybe take some ramen, soba, don, sashimi, then go to UT, h&m, as usual tourists would do. and wan2 try their beer and some desserts maybe.

budget very tight ar!! sacrifice osaka and kyoto!!! sigh .. next time then.

anyway cant hardly wait for next month~ nippon im coming

oct

1.
im going to hk wif ys next yr. hahahaaa finally i will step on the land after 13 yrs later. fuiyo.. its been tat long!! anyway most exciting part is that im going wif my best buddy. its going to be a fun one... so time to plan after back from JJ

2.
so this happened like... sometime ago.. so they wan2 match making me wif dunno-who-he-is, after all da ding dong, so finally his in my fb lists, wtf ppl critic my photos... harlo... im born wif my face, so wat ! watever, stop judging me.

3.
today bro help me pick up my visa, almos cant approve!! luckily its all okay now!! so as schedule, i am flying off in 3 weeks time, to the land of rising sun; to the dream country ; to the place of my j pop; it's a fast forward dreams come true. yay it is!! though da air fare its at 2k... wtf.. but im going to enjoy yo..

not easy, i know

I know, breaking up it's never been easy; no matter to the one been dumped, or the one who dumped.


the world become raining/monsoon seasons. the world as if betray u, nth is sweet, nth is tasty, nth is interesting and nth can make u feel energetic. everyday is like monday, everyday is end of the world; u feel noone understand u, u feel they betray u.



U spent so much time and effort on this r/shp; u give all ur effort; attentions; time; money; even ur most precious; damn F out of sudden, u realise ur in the wrong track of investment; ur judgement telling ur wrong;



but so what? u may scold , u may pissed, u may sad; u may pain, but remember: when ur yelling at top of ur voice; or inside ur heart, the J is not as guilt as u thought he might be. well maybe lil coz due to some humanity; he get da satisfaction.. oops.. but its damn true.



i always think that, a man who dunno how to control da D, its just another assholes. don tell me tat he cant resists of watsoever HOT chicks; jude law din cheated Sienna over megan fox, instead just some super aunty look nanny. so get it? its' all abt the D !!! D wont choose among jolie, megan or scarlett, but its just hole. sigh! F true but lets get over it



arent life great b4 u met the asshole? arent u smile and laugh out loud when heard jokes? arent u love ur family b4 u met him?

not da one

i realised, he is not the type i'd thought he was. how come? it seems to be the longer i know him, the more i know, he's just not the type i'm keen. so that's why he is so 'friend' to me.

well luckily as well, i can fully concentrate in my life. rather than thinking of whatever might happen. so tired when it's 1ft day of pms. it's so emo and all things seems so S n F.

now just wait for wed to come coz im flying off on thurs midnight, thanks to the stupid routine schedule flight on 6.30am. insanely crazy max, much earlier than my trip back to as.

a short getaway before my trip of 2010!!!
love my life
muacks!

21st century gals, i should learn more

story 1:

she sort of famous among frens due to her aggressive attitude to get happiness she want to; aka chasing after guys to be bf. i used to be cheated ; she told us the other gal steal the man from her, due to stupid frenship, we did some 'drama' to scold the man, wtf was, the guy told us, he nvr told her, he like her AT ALL.. he just treated her as frens...

few yrs later, heard tat she get a bf, then she confess to him that she cheated over him, seeking for forgiveness ; da bf act did 4give her; but later she dump him anyway...

few yrs later, heard from frens that, she dump da bf coz he is working in overseas, to earn $4 n married her; she dislike due to LDR and she wan some1 24/7... (maybe she need 7-11, not man)

and now she's attached to a guy, and seems like she found da 7-11... yer...*im so jealous* wtf

story 2:

i nvr like her, she's those type of gals, nvr in my fav lists, nor even wan2 be frens type, maybe jus some stupid bias i guess. but i notice she only have like 1 female fren, the rest all male.

i always heard she has bf, stable type , then later keep seeing her kinda close with this guy, close as in seeing them having meals, hangout, heart 2 heart talk like so often, well i guess jus good frens coz it's normal what..

later on, fren of mine told me, she act having some hanky panky wit this guy, the guy like her alot, they KISSED!!! (as told by insider from the guy!) and that time she still with this stable bf...

oh no... y loyal seems like worthless in current society.. esp those with so call naive or pure look... mean girl like me, well aka devil look, act jus so otaku inside, lack of men like for so long... wtf ler... nvm don ever compare wif such ppl who nvr appreciate loyalty.

story 3:

she has this dream type look of many guys, n i thought she was as per her look, pretty, sweet, innocent, however, im da innocent 1 afterall;

well she is like been taking care by other seniors in uni, while sametime she act has a stable bf for few years dy, then da gal say wan2 break up so da bf found out the gf was act been taking care by some other guys out there. well its ppl's personal life, not within me to judge, but i damn dislike ppl cheat esp in r/ship.

I believe in karma, so i never have a thought of cheating; esp it''s so busy to love a person, where 2 find the extra time to like some1 else? emmm... maybe im just too old school.

to change

i'm so lazy, i cant even write out a draft itinery on my trip. well not really need to be a serious one, but just for my visa application. I read like reaching 100 post on it, and i havent have a brief idea where i wan2 go, coz i wan2 go theme park, i wan2 go all da shopping streets, i wan this n i wan that, end up i dunno what is my priority and whats not. seems to be all are important and must-see places.

i hate fb , it jus has no privacy that i jus jus simply click on any1 inmy lists, to view at all their photos, fine i know it is all about, but i still ... well sometimes wan2 keep it to close frens only. then F hate wat, some frens frens tend to be someone i used 2 know. yarks!

some is blocking fb n msn, but i still manage 2 on9 like 24/7, harlo.. can any1 here really BLOCK them so i cant manage 2 go thru though with these links given ...

at this point, i jus can't think much or plan further, but to let time to come, for my next move to be carried out. I know i nvr been ambitious type, i'm not keen in earning my 1st RM1 million in next couple of years, i jus wan2 go for my plans for these years, da basic plans that i wan for myself. Coz i know, once i found something in my current life, all my plans shall be kiv. i don wan2 change yet, i know myself well, im so into it when my life change, cross my fingers that, before i feel im satisfy, i'm willing to stop, then it will come to me. and the time, I am willing to be da one that i am so worry of. da one that i wan2 be, but at the sametime, I'm so scare due to the uncertainty but thats the risk i'm willing to take, cross my fingers

night and love

the never-ending job in the entire universe

There are things we unable to stop the time and redo it; or we want to go back time and re-write the history; or maybe we just hope we never leave so much of evidences of what we did. One of it I would say is this stupid mail sign up. As for me, I’m like those mailer addict shoppers/consumers. I’m tend to give my info to some brands/shops/things I’m keen to I can be keep update upon their latest activities and promo. I used to sign up for mailer updates from boutiques, foods, restaurants and some even like places I used to be. I check my email daily so easily, I deleted minimum 1 mail from these things I did. So I will like recall back my memories when I sign up for them. Oh I love this place so I sign up, I buy something from here, I hang out here before, I met my friends here, I hang out wif ex before, I love this shop a lot…. Some not so green company will send the mail via posts, so in a way to get rid of them, I have no choice but just to tear off my name and address before I dump into the bin. Life’s crazy when all these little matters are bothering you.

I just realize I have one ‘career woman’ friends among my circle. She works, and she didn’t do any household. that’s the one I’m so envy. You see, some typical traditional Chinese thinking family like mine, is pushing me to the corner. Let’s say household such as laundry. You see there’s invention of washing machines since like stone age, from shirts, skirts, pants, just dump in and put in the washing detergent/powder then just on. The magic will start to wash by itself then wait till it’s done. I personally am facing this issue, which I don’t understand. The females in family, pushing me to hand wash my own lingerie. Okay I started to wash mine since I’m 13. So now I started to work, and I just feel my hands are been very rough and dry. And I’m having this nail polish once while. I don’t even have that much time to really bath myself that details sometimes, and now I need to keep washing my lingerie that often? Daily they will nag me as if nobody business, I wonder maybe they think I’m too perfect so want to start picky on me. I am just so lazy. Why they can’t agree when I just dump all in into the machines and let them do the job. My hands are not rich mistress hands, but I myself have the responsibility to take care of them!

To me, I don’t want to touch the broom, unless I can’t take it anymore. I think my last time was when no one at the house, then someone is coming over. So I sweep and mop the floor. I have this habit over mop that, I must mop the floor twice. But I prefer sweep and mop than doing the laundry. And one more, to collect the dried washed clothes and fold it. Oh my god. Especially when I’m not in good mood, the stupid clothes seems never ending of the quantities. Worse of all, the nag is like the annoying sounds keep humming next to my ears.

I wonder why to the family, female must be the one go into the kitchen and do the job. Who set the rules woman must be the one taking all the jobs of washing dishes, preparing the meals. Who? Who? I do hope I no need to be full time housewife. I just hate it. ARGH… but now I’m living life as ‘career’ woman… heheheh bless me.